Real talk-its been a rough few months since I last posted. And listen, I am as tired of saying that as you are probably of hearing it. I feel like I could probably take over Rachel Drach's job as Debbie Downer if I spent any more time writing about all the details.  It just seems like curve ball after curveball has been thrown, not just for us, but most people across the world-and we are doing our best to hit them, and sometimes we do, and sometimes we miss. But it is what it is.

I've talked before in the past about wanting my posts, here and elsewhere to be honest ones. I still want that-but I also realize as I get older that when we are going through hard things, sometimes the last thing I want to do is write it down, take pics and remember it. I just want to accept it, work through it, and then move forward with the lessons I learned, but not the pain if possible. So this time around, I am going to post the fun in between of these few months. The parts of beauty, growth, fun, and love. Not bc I don't want to be honest-but bc these will be the parts that sustain me through any hard times to come when I need to look backwards in order to move forward. The next time or two around I will probably blog not about happenings, but subjects-like how we got Bear's name, and details on our new and last little one. So after that long introduction, here is what our last few months were like.

Several months ago, my in-laws came for a visit during Lester's rare time off. Since at this point we have no plans to go back to CA during the pandemic, we thought we'd make it a point to get together while the numbers were ok [this was before the second horrible wave hit]. We quarantined before hand, and had the kids take off school to spend this rare time with them. We had a lot of fun at our house, and were super grateful that they brought out my parents van out so we finally have a vehicle to fit our whole growing family! We would seriously be lost without my parents, and Lester's generosity and support. We also got to take a quick day trip to Jackson Hole, Wyoming, the Tetons, and Granite Hot Springs. Because it was the middle of the week it was empty, and so so beautiful. The natural hot springs water was perfect temp, that even my pregnant self could enjoy it. Apart from that and a quick visit to the farmers market where the girls got spoiled with their favorite fruits and henna tattoos it was all pretty low key. It was a fun visit and we enjoyed spending time with them! 

Shortly after that, Isla had a quick visit to the hospital which required some sedation and she was hilarious throughout and such a good sport. Everyone has their kid with the easily triggered gag reflex, and their ER kid...Isla is both in our family. She is amazing and we love her and her positive attitude, and how she keeps us on our toes haha. 

A few days after my in-laws left, we had [what we thought at the time] would be one last visit for the year with my side of the family when 2 of my sisters and 2 of my cousins and I got together with our kids. We went mostly just between our house and Rocio's bc of our sheer numbers, with a quick visit to visit our Grandpa's grave and Rigby Lake in the town he and my Grandma grew up in. Both were also empty and its hard to say what was the funnest part. Seeing the kids absolutely thrive and make connections with their cousins, or having a way too late girls night with us adults. We also threw in there a bday cake [sweet corn with blueberry jam and sour cream lemon frosting] for our October bdays which were coming up, a dance party and a piñata for taco Tuesday. It was a lot of fun, which was great as the next several weeks came on strong with the difficult stuff, some to be expected, some totally not. The kids have not stopped talking about it since. 

[I just love this picture haha.]

Shortly after this, we found ourselves down with COVID. After a long miserable 14 day quarantine, from everyone and everything, we eventually tested negative again and were able to go back to some semblance of normal life. So at the end of the time, when we knew we were unable to both catch and spread it, we got together one last time for an unexpected visit with my sisters and their families again as they were in the same boat. It was a quick little weekend, but made a miserable stint a little less horrible. 

[Isla says her new plan is to be an 'entomologist' bc she loves bugs like this caterpillar so much. She is a great caregiver to all living things.]

Now we are back and have slowly but surely, cautiously made our way back into some routines. The kids are safely [both for their sake, and others] back in school, we've been having family Halloween movie nights while we make our costumes, carved pumpkins etc. Bear boy is becoming more and more independent every day, and is proudly at the point where he can peel himself a clementine and make himself his very own PB&J, a right of passage in my book. Its been a nice bit of normalcy. 

We lasted as long as we could and stopped ourselves from putting up the tree despite feeling like we need some holiday cheer-up until it started snowing one weekend. We decided that a week before Halloween in 2020 was a quite a feat and gave in and up it went. We baked, listened to both Halloween and Christmas music and movies, played in the snow, went on BEAUTIFUL hikes, made hot cocoa and cider, visited the pumpkin patch and got in Bear's first horse ride, talked about what voting means and why its so important, sent off all our ballots, and celebrated our beautiful Ms. Addy's 8th bday with presents, her favorite dinner, and making caramel apples and having ice cream sundaes with Rocio and family. All before Lester had to get back into work full time again. The last few days have felt beautiful after everything is said and done, and I'm grateful for them. Now, onward and forward as we approach the holidays in a new kind of way, and enjoy our cozy home and growing family. 

[raspberry frangipani tart. So so good.]

[Tartine's banana cream pie recipe. crust, chocolate layer, caramel layer, pastry cream layer, bananas, then whipped cream and shaved chocolate.]