Life has a funny way of pacing you, whether you like it or not. After the Christmas extravaganza ended, we still had a few fun activities and things to wrap up through Jan [some high lights being a quick trip to Tahoe with friends, and some new ice cream hot spots and forest exploring dates with Daddy]. And I know that I at least was starting to feel the need for things to slow down a bit-but that didn't seem to fit in with my schedule, or realistically my temperment, so I just pushed that feeling back and kept going.
Enter life/sickness stage right. For once, I seemed to get hit first, and have been feeling sick [both physically and fatigue wise] for a while now. And through out that time, the girls and Lester have handled it like bosses. And even though I have had several moments of feeling bad about it-[like how much TV I've resorted just to get us through the day lately, or how much less I've been getting them out and about or activity wise] Lester has reminded me time and time again that it is OK for me and the kids to not be ON all the time if you will. Its ok for them to have days of just playing at home and learning to entertain themeselves when necassary. This, coupled with the insane storms we've been getting here have added up to a forced break and days at home. Eventually, the girls got a bug [despite having their flu shots] that came with all the fun of fevers, throwing up, runny noses, and so on etc. This added a whole other level of guiltiness [which is typically so not me!] of feeling bad for feeling short tempered with them when they've been unusually demanding-I've been so foucsed on trying to get me through the day, that I didn't realize that them being more difficult was actually signs of them getting sick. I know theres no point in beating myself up about it, but I think its important to be honest about the incredible blessings and joys of parenthood [which I hope I do often, and definetly far outnumber the rough moments for me] but also the hard, trying moments where we fall short. Just for records sake, and womenkind I guess-it helps for me to look back on other times I may be in a funk and figure out what I did to get out of it, and see and count all my blessings. So thats that.
Anywho, with the girls being sick, I have definetly felt the need to [as life has suggested] slow down and write down some things about the girls right now and who they are. I've been wanting too for a while, and just haven't found the time. Now, I have some, and will do so. Feel free to quit reading if you are not interested.
Addy is a ripe old 4 year old, although at times, her intellect and even occasional maturity have suggested she is much older. This is in things like her vocabulary [she says things like 'I officially prefer the original' or in food talk about things being 'cloyingly sweet' etc], her teenage-esque eye rolls then endearing laughs, and in how she behaves when she's sick. This is only the 2nd time in her life that she has legitimately thrown up-and both times, the only way you know is when she tells you she's sorry she made a mess and can I get her a change of clothes while she cleans it up. ANGEL child I tell you. Of course, she still often acts her age, and is crazy, hyper, silly,sometimes bossy, sweet kid. She still loves to read, and learn, and has taken a great interest in helping me in the kitchen. She likes to make up dances as songs, and is very verbal in expressing her love. She likes to joke and tease, but is always the first to want to help. Her and Isla are best friends, and can go from being besties to worst enemies, then back in a matter of minutes. Which I think is just how it should be. She definetly is an oldest child, in how she plays and likes to mother Isla [who likes it when she's being babied, but not when being bossed.] She can be very shy when we first walk into a new setting, or meet new people. But after the first half hour, I find she slowly but surely make her way into the group. She still has these beautiful brown eyes, with eyelashes and hilarious, beautiful expressions for days. She is absoluetly a light in our lives, and we love her to pieces.
Sweet Isla Jane is now a big bad 2 year old, and has come into her own. She lives life with an intensity and fierceness all her own, and we love it. When she is happy, she is HAPPY and wants to share and spread that with everyone and everything around her. Around Christmas time, she literally would run from person to person, whether she saw them daily or only once or twice a year, to cuddle them, then run on to the next person. I love watching and being part of that. She loves to sing real music all day everyday [loud or whispering, depending on the song or occasion], and be cuddled and loved on often. She loves to play 'you be the baby, I be the Momma' alot and enjoys swimming and gymnastics whether shes in the right place or not haha. That said, there is often no medium with her. When she is upset, she is UPSET and expects the world to know it and react accordingly. Rather then taper off, she will build and build until she hits a certain point of explosion then completely level or come off it. It still amazes me how different each child is entirely, all the way from the pregnancy, down to the current day to day things, like how they express love or need different types of disciple to thrive. She is sweet, compassionate, thoughtful, intense, fierce, loving and playful. She still puts her hands on her face when shes tired-if she only has one hand up, she's getting there, but if both hands are on her face, its over, she will be out within minutes. Its adorable, as is everything about her. She's at the wonderful, crazy interesting part of her life where she's definetly not a baby [and is sure to remind you of that] but not quite a full blown kid either. She loves hard and plays hard. While we will often find her picking up things from Addy, we find it often evolves into her own 'Isla' version of it. She is also very verbal, but still can't differentiate her W's and her R's. She also often replaces her Ls with W's. To be honest, I kinda love it-its one of my last 'baby' things she does, and that list is quickly diminishing. She is a wonder, and a joy, and I love the important, different perspectives and things she brings to our family. We all needed her, and are better for her in our family.
So that is a bit more about who are girls right now. I know it probably doesn't matter much to anybody else in the world-but it is what makes my world the wonderful, beautiful mess it often is. And so even though things aren't ideal right now, I am grateful for this time that this affords me to lock these memories away for when I need them again. Which I am sure will be soon, as things keep growing and changing every day.
